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Informative Articles

A Lesson of Life From A Friend
The following is a true story... Yesterday I received a phone call from a friend whom I last talked to almost two years ago. Like other people, I was surprised to hear her voice. She heard from a mutual friend that I just set up a fitness...

Catch-22
Direct Answers - Column for the week of February 16, 2004 I have been married for a little over seven years, with one 2-year-old son and another on the way. Over time, I believe my wife and I have grown apart. Sexually, we never connected. ...

Divorce and Separation - A Child’s perspective
It is always the children that suffer the most when a marriage breaks down and separation or divorce is imminent. Children of divorcing parents often witness arguments even rows and this has a strong effect on any child. Children do not understand...

How To Win Against Impotence
'Impotence' - just the word strikes terror into the heart of every man who is familiar with what it means. As males we identify our sexuality either at least in part, and more often wholly, with our ability to have and maintain an erection. As...

Review: Unbridled Injustice Authored By Ellie Boatman
Norm Goldman reviews Ellie Boatman's Unbridled Injustice Author: Ellie Boatman ISBN: 1598000586 The following review was contributed by: NORM GOLDMAN:  Editor of Bookpleasures. CLICK TO VIEW   Norm...

 
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Dating Tip: Getting the Commitment

A lot of women want to know how to get a man to commit.

Even though we know better, we still believe (consciously or subconsciously) that our purpose in life is to get a man to fork over a two-carat diamond and a house in the suburbs. At the dawn of 2006, this is still perceived as the pinnacle of success for women.

As a result, too many of us stay in relationships that don't make us happy. We tell ourselves that if we say the right thing, do the right thing, buy the right thing, we can get some guy to marry us and validate us in the eyes of our friends, our parents, and society.

We play games with our sexuality. We submit to unnecessary surgeries and wear clothing that make us candidates for pneumonia, all in an effort to hook a man. We have sex not because it's what we want, but because we want to keep a guy's interest. We stop having sex when he doesn't come forth with a ring because, as our mothers told us, "Why buy the cow when the milk's free?"

And, in the end, it usually doesn't work. We don't get the commitment. We wonder why, deep down inside, we are ultimately unlovable.

The reason for it is simple. We don't love ourselves. Heck, we don't even own ourselves. We dress, act, speak, and have sex to please (or manipulate) others. The fact that, at the tail end of 2005, we still use expressions like, "Why buy the cow when the milk's free," is astonishing.

You are not a cow. You are a woman. You will attract a man who will gladly, eagerly commit to you when you start believing that you have a bigger purpose in


life than getting married.

This means you:

Dress for yourself, not for someone else.

Stop postponing doing things you want to do because you think you need a guy to do them with (or that you have to "check with" your boyfriend first).

Stop waiting for some guy to commit to you. If he says he's not ready, do yourself a favor and back off. Stop being taken for granted. Make plans that don't include him (this will do one of two things; either he'll realize he can't live without you, or you'll realize he definitely can).

Have sex when it's right and because you enjoy it. Don't use (or not use) your body to "get" a man.

In other words, get a life. Love yourself. Treat yourself as a treasure that has yet to be discovered.

There are plenty of tricks you can use to hook a man, but they usually involve manipulation, deceit, and the loss of yourself. And, while they usually don't work, it's worse when they do. Women who used them tend to be divorced or miserably married today.

So, make a commitment to yourself. Be true to yourself. Value yourself. You will send a signal to men that you are special, different, and worth their time and effort.

One of those men will prove to be worth your time and effort, too.



About the author:

Terry Hernon MacDonald is the author of "How to Attract and Marry the Man of Your Dreams." Sign up for free dating tips at http://www.marrysmart.com . Check out her blog at http://happygirlmusing.blogspot.com